nosdrinker:

my english teacher accused me of plagiarizing an essay i wrote about my own life

18 minutes ago WITH 377,682 notes VIA egberts (Source: nosdrinker)

qalaba:

miscegene:

summertimelovegirl:

blue-author:

gallifrey-feels:

awkwardsmilememe:

THIS CROW FUCKING UNDERSTANDS WATER DISPLACEMENT. WHY THE FUCK DO I HAVE TO BE TOLD EVERY YEAR BY A TEACHER HOW WATER DISPLACEMENT WORKS. DO THEY THINK I’M LESS INTELLIGENT THAN A FUCKING CROW? FUCKING DONE.

Crows discovered the principle of displacement in the third century BC, when the philosopher Awkimedes, upon noticing the level of his bird bath rose in proportion with the amount of his body that was submerged, reportedly exclaimed “EURECAW!” and flew through the streets of Athens shouting his discovery.

EURECAW

Tumblr will believe anything smfh. The law that’s being described is Archimedes’ Principle and Archimedes of Syracuse(the guy who discovered this) said Eureka, not Eurecaw.

19 minutes ago WITH 250,641 notes VIA aslightlyangryfeminist (Source: 4gifs)

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24 minutes ago WITH 2 notes

detectivanilla:

percymyjackson:

So my driving teacher has three fingers on one hand and four on the other and he makes puns about it and it’s great.
And today he was like
“I went to the museum and found my ancestors’ look guys!”
And showed us this…

WHY DOES THIS NOT HAVE MORE NOTES

34 minutes ago WITH 68,468 notes VIA moanda (Source: percymyjackson)

destiny trio for karni

36 minutes ago WITH 386 notes VIA tiny-snail (Source: teraqua)

loriarty:

i have never seen a picture that represented this entire show more than this.

39 minutes ago WITH 119,987 notes VIA notveryfireproof (Source: ehmthesuperblog)

bestxatxspace:

waffleguppies:

weloveshortvideos:

How we fight tall people

Vine by Rudy Mancuso

I can’t stop watching it its like poetry

40 minutes ago WITH 102,827 notes VIA derangedatbest (Source: weloveshortvideos.com)

a-closed-casket:

Me and my friend painted two portal murals at school.

41 minutes ago WITH 17,186 notes VIA fondlyregarded (Source: a-closed-casket)

drunkdilf:

bread is so fucking good man I could prob eat an entire bakery in 25 minutes or less 

43 minutes ago WITH 208,081 notes VIA venadohime (Source: cyberho)

nivalingreenhow:

when McGonagall finds out that Ginny is pregnant, and that the Weasley and Potter bloodlines will converge, she marks on her calender the day the child will turn 11 and that is the day she retires 

44 minutes ago WITH 68,823 notes VIA moanda (Source: nivalingreenhow)

lord-kitschener:

clestroying:

clestroying:

What do you call a cheap circumcision?

A rip off

image

55 minutes ago WITH 169,357 notes VIA stabbybutt (Source: clestroying)

postllimit:

i really hate it when i’m trying to be cute on snapchat and take a selfie like so

 image

but then the app lags for like 20 years and i end up capturing my true form 

image

no thank you

58 minutes ago WITH 15,353 notes VIA kawaiinessyo (Source: postllimit)

“Dear future child
If it’s 3am and you find yourself in a world of complete despair
Please do not turn to strangers on the internet for solace as I did
Please climb onto my bed
And I will hold you until the demons sleep
If it is Thursday morning and you are too sad to move
I won’t force you
I will buy ice cream and we will watch your favourite tv show and I will remind you of your importance
If you feel as if you have no purpose
I will remind you that you were created entirely with love and every pain you feel, I feel too
When you’re sure you can’t go on anymore
I will tell you that when I was 21 I searched for peace at the bottom of a vodka bottle chased by a bottle of pain killers
But that five years later
When you were placed in my arms in the delivery room
I realised that you were why I had been holding on
Without realising it, you saved me, do you know how amazing that is?
So if you ever feel like grabbing that vodka bottle, put it down, we will get in the car and I will drive until the sky turns magenta
I will show you how the sun rises every morning to encourage you to rise too
Sweetheart I refuse to be unaware of your sufferings
As my mother was to mine.”

Your mental health is my priority. (via be-fearless-brave-and-kind)

Reblogging because this is the relationship my mother and I had - still have - and it saved my life more times than I can count.

I am in my 30’s now, and I sat down at my kitchen table not 24 hours ago and cried with my mom about bad dreams, and she still teared up to see me hurting. I want to be this parent. Everyone should want to be this parent.

(via homu-mado)